Saturday, September 22, 2012

45 Days To Go

C will be 17 in 45 days. He is planning on coming home then. I know it will be a big adjustment if he does, but we can work through it. I really don't have much to say tonight, just wanted you all to know that I am counting down the days. And praying he is strong enough to leave her and come home. I miss my Pooh Bear!!!

Thursday, September 20, 2012

I Don't Understand!!!

This is not about my story, but about others that I am reading, and some I saw on that stupid show "I'm Having Their Baby."

If a woman does not want her child, for whatever reason, and the father does want the child, why doesn't she just give the baby to him??? How can a woman take that decision away from him? And the court system does the same thing. I have been following 2 stories where the dad wanted the child, and the mother placed the child for adoption anyway. And now the dads are fighting in court for their children!!! And it's taking forever! With no guarantees.

Also the children who were kidnapped from foreign countries and sold to adopters here in the US. When there is proof that the child was never placed for adoption and a court in the original country demands the return of a kidnapped child, why does our government not step in? I have to admit that I have lost a lot of faith in our legal system over my lifetime. I believed when I was younger that these people were here to help us. I starting learning in middle school just how wrong I was.

I will continue to pray for all the mothers and fathers fighting for their children. And I will pray for the world to understand how wrong it is, and make some changes. Mainly that the first thing people ask is if it can't be an open adoption. It shouldn't even be brought up when no adoption should have taken place to begin with! One day these children will grow up and realize what was done to them. And I hope the kidnappers get what they deserve.

Okay my vent for the day is over now.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

A Misunderstanding

Okay, so I have told you about my fight to keep my youngest son, all because I was homeschooling. So now I need to tell you about a conversation I had with my baby boy not too long ago.

We were just finishing up Language Arts, and he says, "Mama, DFCS was wrong for taking us to court. You do a good job teaching me."

I replied, "Thank you baby. Sometimes people don't understand, and they think we are doing something wrong, even though we are doing the best thing for our kids. So they do what they can to find out what we should be doing."

He thought about that for a few minutes, and then asked, "Mama, when they took C and J1 away, were you doing things wrong? Or was it a misunderstanding, too?"

My eyes immediately filled up with tears. I told him it was a misunderstanding. So he says, "I can't believe I had to grow up without my brothers just because of a misunderstanding. I wish you could have proved you were doing good back then."

It is so heartbreaking to have my 8 year old ask me such questions. It is heartbreaking that he should even understand at such a young, innocent age how crooked this world is. All I can do is try to teach him that yes, the world can be crooked, but there are good people too. And teach him to always do what is right, and try to help change the world when he grows up. I have my work cut out for me. But at least I know that he understands that I am a good Mother, and that he should have always known his brothers.